I first went to Thailand in 1997 and immediately fell in love with the country. Thailand at that time to me was mysterious and exotic, full of potentials and pitfalls.
Fast forward to 2010 and here I am after 13 years and many trips to the LOS sharing, with the help of my 
Thai Engagement Ceremony
Question: Exactly how and when to get engaged is not clear to me. Is this simply between the man and woman, or is it customary for the bride’s parents to be involved?
Answer: It is definitely customary for the bride’s parents to be involved in the engagement, however a Thai engagement is much different from what we are used to in the west. Thai’s have a ceremony for the engagement which is called thong mun in Thai. This literally means “gold giving” and that is exactly what the ceremony is, the prospective groom gives gold to his fiancee.
Thai’s do not typically give diamond rings as a promise of engagement, but have historically given gold instead. Of course, almost every foreigner that I know how is engaged or married to a Thai girl has given her girl a diamond ring and the ladies really seem to like it. So, you may want to go with both.
The engagement ceremony is normally attended by friends and family and can be done in advance of the wedding ceremony or can even be done right before the marriage ceremony. When giving the gold it must be an even number of baht (a baht is the unit of measure for Thai gold. One baht = 1/2 troy ounce). The gold is usually in the form of necklace or bracelet.
I hope this was helpful and wish you all the best with your Thai girlfriend or fiancee.
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This was a good tip that i hadn’t heard before. I was about to give a diamond ring, but i like the idea of giving a nice gold necklace. (Maybe as well) What is an acceptible weight of gold necklace for an engagement ?
I’m learning a lot from your web site, thanks.
can you give actual gold flakes or nuggets, i gold mine some times
Are you serious? You really mine gold? Now I’ve heard everything.
I suppose it would be acceptable, but I think the jewelery is more appreciated because they can actually wear it.
Maybe you could take the nuggets and make some sort of necklace/bracelet/ring from them? That would be romantic too.
I am doing an engagement soon and I’m totally confused but excited. I am half Thai/American… but there is supposed to be more to the ceremony like some acting or dramatic play…the Bride’s party is supposed to have a little gaurd the gate of the home and the Groom’s party is to negotiate with her to let them in… sounds cute but I need to do more homework…. and then there is the traditional Thai dresses…yikes! I’m actually nervous…but looking forward to family and friends all gathering for this…just hope its not too hot for everybody.
Hi Nina,
Congratulations on your engagement! You’ll have to write and let us know what the actual engagement ceremony is like as I’ve never had the experience. The guard at the gate” thing you’re referring to is actually part of the wedding ceremony though. I know because I had to do that myself when Golf and I were married. You can imagine how comical I was with my very limited Thai
It was all great fun though.
If you’re getting engaged in Thailand I hope it won’t be too hot for everyone either. I remember sweltering in my traditional Thai wedding suit under the hot sun in central Thailand. No one else seemed to mind, but they did have to bring out some fans for me.
please i need your help… i have a thai boyfriend and i am a filipino. he proposed a marraige to me and i told him to ask my father about it first but he told me that he will only do that at the wedding day. now i want to know if that is the new way of proposing a marriage in thailand? i am looking forward to get your reply. thank you