Thai Bar Girls and Foreigners
Over the years I’ve read a lot of posts, articles and stories about Thai bar girls and specifically about foreign men falling in love with Thai bar girls. And I would say that 95% of these stories end badly. For the other 5% the stories are often new so we don’t yet know what the end will be. I think we can all guess though.
Oftentimes the writer or poster has even read the warnings and been given specific additional warnings by the regulars on each forum. And yet they continue in their folly only to show up later a bit older and wiser for their experience. Each year you read about Americans or Europeans or Australians who commit suicide in places like Patong and Pattaya. Most of these stories revolve around a bar girl and the loss of considerable amounts of money. Since the victim is now dead we will never know the complete truth, but based on past tragedies we can guess.
What is it that drives men to such stupidity even in the face of overwhelming evidence that Thai bar girls should, in every case, be avoided as romantic interests, girlfriends and wives. Why are the men so blind and each one of thousands telling himself “this is different”. It’s not different, it never is and it never will be.
Ask yourself this…would you behave the same way in your home country? What I mean is would you shack up with a prostitute and give her the equivalent of several thousand dollars a month or more? Would you look the other way when you know she is out sleeping with other men or even keeping other boyfriends?
Maybe some of you would and you do it here in Thailand because you can’t afford to do the same thing in your home country. If that’s the case then you are asking for and deserve anything that comes your way. If that’s not you then wise up…take a look at your relationship and ask yourself these questions:
- Is your gf/wife evasive about her phone calls? Does she get calls at odd hours? If you had a gf/wife in your home country and she was hiding phone calls from you wouldn’t you be suspicious.
- Does she consistently need money to send home. Seems to be the same amount each month. This is not conclusive, but could indicate a bf/husband back in her hometown.
- Tattoos and piercings outside of her ears (nose and lips especially) is an indication of a bar girl. “Good” Thai girls don’t do this, although this is changing for the younger generation, but mostly in Bangkok only.
- Are her friends involved in prostitution. This is perhaps one of the biggest indicators as like types tend to gravitate together because as with anything else they have similar experiences to share.
Basically just practice some common sense. I know that many men lose their minds when they come to Thailand for the first time. They aren’t used to seeing so many beautiful girls and they certainly aren’t used to getting the attention of beautiful girls of any kind in their home countries. And even if they are used to getting the beautiful girls at home it never seemed so easy as in Thailand.
So, they think with their penis’ instead of their brains and they ignore things that would set off multiple alarms if they were back in their normal home surroundings. Somehow everything else around them is so different even surreal at times so their new relationship with the Thai bargirl, while strange is no stranger than anything else in their new lives. Instead of using their usual filters to determine what’s good and bad, right and wrong the brain sets up a new category called “This is Thailand” to measure against. Since all of the data is new many men make mistakes.
You can almost hear their brains crying out to them, “It isn’t supposed to be like this. Why is she always secretive or disappearing? Why does she talk with so many other men? Etc etc”. And the new “This is Thailand” section of their brains tells them “Calm down, I know what you’re used to, but This is Thailand it’s not like (the U.S. U.K. Australia or wherever you’re from). Everything is different here so this is probably normal”.
It’s not normal. Listen to your common sense when in Thailand just like you would at home. Things are different here, but not that different. Human nature is still human nature, even if the rules are a bit different. Take the advice of others who have come before you. Yes it is possible that Noi is different, but it is a very small chance. Do you want to gamble your savings, your heart and your sanity on it? Why not just take the time to meet a nice girl instead of a Thai bar girl and avoid all the heartache and expense.
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Nana Entertainment Plaza (or NEP) began 25 years ago when several bars on Soi 14-Soi 16 were forced to close indefinitely because of construction on Sukhumvit Road. In mid 1982 the Rosemarys (1&2) , The Three Roses and The Rainbow Bar all moved into Nana plaza which was formerly your normal run of the Thai strip mall and parking area. Since that time it has grown to almost 40 bars packed into the central court area of Nana Plaza.
Nana is famous for it’s Go-Go bars where you can find scads of scantily clothes Thai girls gyrating on stage and around shiny poles, all meant to excite and titillate the variety of visitors that come just for that purpose. Nana Plaza is also famous for the katoey or ladyboy bars in the area. Many are the man who hasn’t understood the difference between the lovely katoeys in Nana Plaza and been handed a large surprise later.
The first time visitor to Nana Plaza should be prepared for a surreal experience with the area looking like a neon lit circus midway in full swing and music pumping from the various bars surrounding Nana Plaza. Bible thumping missionaries, prostitutes, western sexpats, camera wielding Japanese tourists and curious tourist young and old fill the area making it a great place to sip a beer and watch the diversity of humanity in all its forms. No matter how far and wide you travel you are unlikely to see another place even remotely like it.
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