Still answering questions from “What Do YOU Want to Know About Thailand?” this post veers away from the Thai dating questions and addresses a question regarding internet access in Thailand from Cody.

Question:  How does one set up a reliable, fast internet connection? (Seems like you must have a reliable connection?)

Answer:  I’m actually going to cheat a bit on this one because part of it has been answered so well on another site.  I seriously recommend that unless you have a business need for internet you simply go with the free Wi-fi that is available all over Thailand.  First of all it’s free and second of all it comes without the hassle of dealing with the Thai Cable or Telecom providers.

For a really complete guide to free Wi-fi access throughout Thailand just point your browser to Stickmans Guide to Thailand Wi-fi.

Stickman claims that he isn’t going to list all of the Wi-fi spots on the page, but there are so many that he really doesn’t need to list them all.  Of course the list is best for Bangkok, but there are listings for other places as well including Samui, Krabi and Pattaya.

You can also head off to one of the many internet cafe’s in Bangkok where prices range from 20-100 baht per hour.

If you’re looking to get broadband access in your apartment you could face some serious frustrations.  Thailand is not noted for its efficiency and internet communication is no exception to this rule.

Currently there are just two telecoms in Bangkok for wired connections – TOT (Telephone Organization of Thailand) and True.  Both offer ADSL or you can go with one of many other (unproven?) ISP’s.

Here’s where the fun begins.  To get a phone line installed you will need a work permit.  No permit…then you will have to try to get your landlord to set up the service in his/her name, but be prepared for them to try to tack on a bit extra or even balk at the idea because they have no idea about the internet.

The cost will be between 600-2000 baht per month and speeds can be anywhere from 512k to 1Mb/sec.  True is generally recognized to be much better, but you might not have a choice.  If TOT installed the phone line then you’ll have to go with TOT.

There are other ISP’s out there, but they are so new that most of them are leasing bandwidth from TOT and True anyway.

Here’s what you’ll need to set up broadband a condo/apartment renter (courtesy of ThailandGuru)

1. Photocopy of the “House Registration” of the owner (showing who owns the property that the service is going to)
2. Photocopy of the Thai ID card of the owner, which they must sign
3. Photocopy of the lease (which links the property to you)
4. Photocopy of your passport, signed
5. A few thousand baht handy
6. A smile

You can read the rest of his article here, it goes into much greater depth than this post.

Overall I go with Wi-Fi or an internet cafe to make my life easier and cheaper, especially if you won’t be staying in Thailand long term.

Popularity: 5% [?]

Continue Reading

I would like to know more about what a Thai woman seeks in marriage abroad to a western husband. Do they have a realistic view of us, or do they subscribe to various fantasies about us?

Answer: I spoke with Golf about this and she told me that for her and her friends the expectations are completely normal. Of course Thai’s do believe that Americans are all rich and we are in terms of Thai earning potential. The only way to truly dispel this is once you get married and your new Thai wife comes to the U.S. Make sure she is involved in the finances and bill paying and she will begin to see that while we Americans make a lot of money it is also much more expensive to live in the U.S.

The thing that opened Golf’s eyes the most was after she started working and interacting with working class Americans (vs the typical well off Thailand tourist). She came back from work one day and commented “Americans aren’t all rich are they?” I replied that I had been trying to tell her that and she shook her head and said “yes”, but she hadn’t really understood before. Golf still gets surprised at the cost of some things here compared to Thailand.

That aside, Thai women know that Americans and Europeans are more faithful in relationships, less abusive and more generous as a whole than their Thai counterparts. So, they expect these things, but I believe that is the reality anyway. They also know that the standard of living in America and Europe is much higher than in Thailand. So, they are seeking a better standard of living and a husband that is faithful, generous and loving. Pretty realistic I’d say.

And then I received this back:

Sounds to me that Thai women just want a reasonable married life with an appreciative husband. Like you say, pretty realistic. If fidelity, kindness, and generosity are lacking in the average Thai man, then Thai women will find American men to be much more satisfactory in this regard. Add to that our improved living standard, our mandated gender equality, the broad scope of opportunities for work and for education, then I think that the western world is very likely a big step up for many Thai woman.

Popularity: 28% [?]

Continue Reading

Here it is! The 100th post at Thailand Musings! I am very excited and to commemorate the 100th post I have (finally) updated the “About Golf and Steve” page. Golf is also working on her contribution to that page.

Thank you to my older readers and welcome to the new readers. I hope to get to know you much better over the coming year.

It’s somehow right that the hundredth post comes at the beginning of a new year. I am seeing the potential here to help many and to share my thoughts and stories as well as the thoughts and stories of others. I’m very excited for the upcoming new year and expect that it will hold good things for us all.

To all of you I want to wish a happy and prosperous 2008!

Popularity: 4% [?]

Continue Reading

I hope that English is not unusually difficult for a Thai person to learn, especially when motivated. Are there special courses available for this here in the US, or is it more efficient for the woman to attend English classes in Thailand?

Answer: Have you tried to learn any Thai yet? If you have you will know how difficult it is. English is just as hard for a Thai person to learn in my experience. The languages are so completely different that it is impossible to form a common frame of reference. Grammar, sentence structure and etymology for the languages are so far apart that there is no common reference like there would be for you and I learning a Romance language or for a Thai person learning an Asian language. It may be getting better for younger Thai’s as English is now taught from a young age at many of the Thai schools.

I am not aware of any special classes available here specifically for Thai’s, however you can find ESL classes at your local universities usually and there are other non-profit’s that do ESL tutoring. Check with your local United Way agency or Literacy Council in your area.

The best way is to have your girlfriend start taking classes now in Thailand, practice speaking as much as possible and then take more classes here in the U.S. Of course the best way to learn is by actual practice and while Golf’s English was already pretty good, she made the best progress once she started working here in the U.S. and interacting everyday with native English speakers.

Popularity: 9% [?]

Continue Reading

More questions and answers today that were generated  by the post What Do YOU Want to Know About Thailand?  Keep the questions coming and I will be answering as fast as possible.

My travel abroad has been limited to European destinations, so I have never traveled to Asia.  I understand that the flight time is quite long.  I’d be interested in learning the best way to get there. I assume that you depart from New York westbound, but I really don’t know.

Answer:  Yes, the flight is long.  Thai Airways runs a 17 hour flight non-stop leaving from JFK airport.  They fly east (well actually north as they go over the north pole).  As you can imagine the flight is not fun, but Thai Airways makes it as bearable as possible.  The cost is around $1600 round trip last time I looked.

Alternatively you can look for cheaper flights with connections, but that usually pushes the flight over 20 hours and you typically don’t save that much, maybe a couple hundred dollars.  I remember I once took a flight on Gulf Airlines that connected in Paris (CDG) and then again in Dubai (no idea what the airport is).  The total flight was 24 hours, but the cost was just $850.  At the time I could have flown non-stop with Thai at $1200.

Thinking back on the experience I would have been better off paying more for the convenience of a non-stop flight.  Of course if you don’t want to be cooped up for 17 hours straight then connecting flights might be the better way to go.  Needless to say, my last 4 flights have been non-stop on Thai Airways.

Popularity: 4% [?]

Continue Reading

Question: I assume it would be natural for Thai parents to have some legitimate concerns about a foreign guy marrying their daughter. Can you provide your insight about this?

Answer: I want to preface my answer by saying that Golf has read it and agrees with me.

The above dowry and family support answers also apply to your question regarding parent’s views of foreign husbands. Of course the parents are concerned for their daughters and the intentions and ability of the foreigner to take care of her. They also consider Europeans and Americans to be rich, which we are in terms of the typical Thai lifestyle. Of course they are rich in other ways in my opinion, but that’s another topic entirely.

I think once you meet the parents and they see that you and your Thai girlfriend love each other much of their concern will be gone. Add to that a little bit of generosity so they see that you can take care of their daughter and her kids and you’ll be fine.

My mother-in-law hovers over me and takes care of me like a mother hen when we visit. And this is even though she speaks no English and I speak very limited Thai.

I really don’t think that the parents are much of a concern in most cases although I have heard stories of parents telling their daughter she is not allowed to marry with someone (Thai or foreigner) and the daughter will follow their wishes. In many cases this is because the parents have already arranged a marriage for their daughter which is not something you need to worry about.

If you really want her parents on your side make your trip to Thailand for at least two weeks and spend several days of that time visiting her hometown and her parents/family. Bring small gifts for everyone and take care of restaurant bills etc. while there (no one likes a cheap son-in-law). This will go a long way in furthering your case in most parents eyes and will give you some face as well which is always good in Thailand.

Popularity: 16% [?]

Continue Reading

Question: My USAF friend who married a Thai woman once told me “when you marry a Thai, you wind up supporting all of her relatives back home”. What’s the reality?

Answer:

Golf and I still do that to send money to her parents and sister. When you are married to a Thai woman you are married to her whole family. Some take it farther than others including aunts, uncles, and cousins.

As far as Golf is concerned we help her parents and occasionally her sister. For her parents it is maybe 10,000-20,000 Bt every few months and about the same for her sister. Really though when you think about it her sister is in grad school so I don’t think it’s much difference than here. Although usually it is the parents helping the student here in the US.

The thing is that for Thai culture it is the daughter’s responsibility to care for her parents and to take care of their needs especially as they get older. Keep this in perspective though. Like I said we send maybe 10,000 a month total and as you know that is a monthly salary for a Thai woman in Bangkok.

In the provinces cost are about 50% of what they are in Bangkok so 10,000 Bt in the provinces of Thailand is enough to support a Thai couple easily. Certainly I don’t think it would support you or I, but let’s face it we’re spoiled :>)

What I’m trying to say is that it is good and expected that you help the family, but you have to understand what is enough and set some limits. I was lucky in that Golf pretty much set the limits and in fact it is money from her salary that she now sends for her family.

Popularity: 13% [?]

Continue Reading

Question: The concept of dowry in Thailand is really wild! I have read much groaning about this, however I am a realist. I don’t know if I like it or not, but I must smile and deal with it. But, how is the amount settled upon?

Answer:

Touching on the Thai dowry question…it is a bit of a sticky question and although it is a bit of an old fashioned concept (and not really Thai, but imported from the Chinese) it is still expected that some dowry (or sin sot as it is known in Thai) is paid.

A bit of historical perspective…the idea of sin sot came about because of the before mentioned cultural trait of daughters caring for the parents. In a traditional Thai family the daughter lives with her parents and works on their farm until she gets married. Remember that even today Thailand is about 80% agricultural based. When the daughter got married her future husband paid a sin sot to the parents to compensate them for the loss of a worker on their farm. Typically the money was used to hire cheap labor.

Today the dowry is used mostly as a way of showing how rich the husband is and how well he will be able to take care of his new bride. If you’ve read anything about the idea of “face” in Thai culture you’ll understand that the dowry today is a way for the family to gain face in the community.

That being said, again it is necessary to understand what is necessary and what is too much. Also understand that with the rise of a more middle class Thai culture many parents choose to give the dowry money back to their daughter after the wedding and in fact it is traditional for the parents to give the gold to the daughter (dowry is typically ½ cash and ½ gold).

The amount of dowry is usually negotiated with the family (usually the mother or grandmother) by the grooms’ best friend. Of course that won’t work in your case and the negotiations would be carried out by your Thai girlfriend with input from you of course.

In the provinces the typical dowry is between 50,000 and 100,000 Bt in a Thai-Thai wedding although I know some of Golf’s friends are in the 200,000-300,000 Bt range. Keep in mind that 50-100% of this money is going back to the couple after the wedding.

Also, during the Thai wedding ceremony all of the guests come up to congratulate the couple and they hand them an envelope with cash in it. In the case of our marriage I paid 200,000 for the dowry (1/2 cash ½ gold). We got all of the gold back after the wedding, but gave her parents the money from the guests’ envelopes (~100,000 Bt) and also the 100,000 in cash to help pay for the wedding costs.

Use your common sense and don’t pay more than you can afford and certainly not more than what a yearly salary would be for your new Thai family in the provinces of Thailand. Just my opinion.

Popularity: 28% [?]

Continue Reading

This is the first in a series of posts answering questions that were posed to me by an American man who met a Thai girl on a Thai internet dating site. Hopefully these will be of help to others in the same or a similar situation.

Question: I asked about my Thai girlfriend’s work and learned that she works a 40 hour week. But I think she said her income was 10,000 Baht per month. That seems impossibly low to me. Can this be true?

Answer: Yes 10,000 Bt a month is a typical salary for many jobs in Bangkok. In fact, those without a college degree can expect less. For perspective, Golf is a Registered Nurse and was making 16,000 Bt (~US$500) a month at one of the better international hospitals. The nurses’ aides there were making 7000-8000 Bt a month I think. Seems impossible to you and I and it would be impossible for you and I, but Thai’s have different expectations. It is fine for them to spend 2000-3000 for a studio apartment with no air-con and eat from street vendors for most meals. Many women (and guys) in Thailand are living like this. Street vendor meals can be had for as little as 20-30 Bt. I know on 16,000 a month Golf still had money for a monthly trip to the beach or back north to her parents. Thailand can be REALLY cheap if you know what you’re doing. If you’re willing to sacrifice a bit even you and I could probably get by on 25,000 Bt a month (I wouldn’t really want to try now though – maybe when I was 23 y/o).

Popularity: 17% [?]

Continue Reading

Here’s a warning from one of my readers who has just ventured into the waters of online dating with Thai women. I think he is right that this is elementary and easily avoidable. It is also especially important when chatting with Thai ladies as they can be EXTREMELY jealous. If you don’t believe me then take a look at this article from the Taipei Times which describes how Thailand has become the world center for penis re-attachment surgery because of Thai wives penchant for cutting it off in the face of infidelity.

“This sounds elementary and easily avoidable, but it is easy for a newbie to find himself in a sticky situation. My story is probably typical. Shortly after I met my Thai girlfriend, another woman contacted me from Loei. I answered her inquiry, and politely told her in the first few sentences that I was already talking with a woman in Bangkok, and that she should not regard me as a potential husband, although I would be happy to chat. So we began to exchange music files and photos of our regions. My friend in Loei wished me good luck with the lady in Bangkok.

About ten days later, my Thai girlfriend asked if I had talked with many other Thai women online. I explained that yes, I had contacted or been contacted by many women. She seemed alarmed by this, but I assured her that she was the only one I was seriously talking with now. She asked if I continue to talk with any of these women, and I told her of my penpal friend in Loei, and about my interest in Lao music. However, this did not seem to sit well with my Thai girlfriend. I told her that my friend in Loei had been clearly advised of my non-availability. I asked what should I do, and I believe her exact words were “you can do whatever you want to do”. Here in the USA, we men know that this phrase can sometimes be woman-speak for “stop immediately”. (Here in Thailand it means pretty much the same thing!)

The lady in Loei has been very friendly, and I do enjoy the chats. Recently I made clear to her that I enjoyed her company, and shortly thereafter I began to receive emails and chats now containing hearts, flowers, kisses, and some statements of love interest. That’s great, sure I appreciate the attention, yes she is a great woman, I enjoy her friendship, but a problem is brewing here.

So, at minimum, I will probably need to send the Thai lady in Loei a letter translated into Thai in order to clear this up with her. In reality, I may need to terminate the penpal relationship to avoid problems with either woman. This would be too bad, since I really enjoy the friendship. In truth, I would consider her a viable possibility if, for some reason, my current Thai girlfriend does not work out. But, since I’m honest and strictly monogamous, I certainly do not wish to appear otherwise, and above all I absolutely do not want to be the cause of hurt feelings through misunderstanding. So, as you can see, I have encountered a “slippery slope” here.”

Yes, it does look like you’ve encountered a “slippery slope”, but at least you’ve run into it early and you are respectful of your girlfriends feelings. It is so common for Thai men to have a mistress or leave their wives for another woman that Thai women are very jealous and suspicious of ANY other woman that shows interest in her man. Thai women know very well how the male brain works and how easy we are to seduce.

I had the same problem early in my relationship with Golf, however when the truth came out she was talking to other guys on Thai Love Links during our early chats as well so we figured “no harm no foul” and we were both even. Of course when you’re in the realm of internet dating it’s not unusual for people to hedge their bets at least initially.

Popularity: 3% [?]

Continue Reading

Alright you’ve asked and now the ball is in my court to respond. Already two readers have responded to my post What Do YOU Want to Know About Thailand? in the comments thread. This is great! Keep the questions coming. I will be responding to questions in posts as quickly as possible so keep an eye out for new posts, they should be fairly frequent right now.

In addition to the questions I have received in the comments I am in email communication with a guy who has begun a long distance relationship with a lady from Bangkok Thailand. I will be keeping their identities quiet to preserve their privacy, but he has given me permission to share his questions and my answers with you all. He is new to both internet dating and to Thailand and Thai women so the questions and answers will be very enlightening for many of the readers here I think. I would like to thank him here publicly for adding to the information available here at Thailand Musings.

I’m off now to answer some of your questions. Have a great weekend everyone!

Popularity: 3% [?]

Continue Reading

Today I thought it would be fun to open things up to you, the reader. I get emails all the time with specific questions about Thailand, where to go, cultural questions, questions about Thai women and dating. I like this and it’s one of the more rewarding aspects of having this blog.

All of this one on one communication doesn’t help the community though. So, I thought it would be fun to open up a post specifically for Thailand questions.

You can use this thread to ask questions in the comment section about ANYTHING at all Thailand related. Depending on the question I will either respond directly in the comments or write a full post if the question requires more detail.

This is your chance to ask any and all Thailand questions. Traveling to Thailand soon? Maybe you want to know about prices. I could do a Bangkok shopping trip to give you the current prices of common items. What about hotels? Where do I stay if I want to do [fill in the blank]. Where are some good local restaurants in Bangkok (or sushi, indian, italian…you name it)? How does Thai dating/engagement/marriages work? Do I need vaccines when traveling to Thailand? Are there business opportunities in Thailand? Where do I find them?

I think you’re starting to get the picture. This is me opening up the blog for you to tell me what you want me to write about. Don’t get me wrong, I have plenty of ideas yet and if you don’t give me anything you’ll still get plenty of fresh content here. I just thought that there might be some subjects/questions that people want to know about more than others and this is your chance to let me know.

So, let the questions flow. Keep me so busy writing that I get cramps in my hands and bloodshot eyes. And while you’re at it please subscribe to my feed so you can be sure to know when your question has been answered.

I’m looking forward to hear about all the things my readers want to know more about.

Popularity: 25% [?]

Continue Reading

If you want something for the kids in Samui (or even for you) then head over to Srisothorn Road, Chachoengsao Provincial Center for the World Sand Sculpture Festival which is being held in Thailand for the first time ever.

The World Sand Sculpture Festival is the largest indoor sand sculpting event in the world and has previously been held in several European countries including France, Belgium, The Netherlands, Germany, the United Kingdom and Denmark. It was started 14 years ago and has become quite popular since then, but has never been held in Asia. This years stop in Samui Thailand marks the first time the event has been outside Europe.

The event covers almost 5 acres and will feature over 80 sand sculptures by 70 artists from around the world. An amazing 40,000 tons of sand is being used to create the sand sculptures.

Three zones have been created for the sculptures as follows:

The Royal Projects Zone
The sand sculptures in this zone depict themes related to Royal Projects initiated by His Majesty the King of Thailand and reflect the extraordinary achievements of His Majesty the King of Thailand during the 60 years of his glorious reign.

The Thai History and Thai Literature Zone
The collection of 11 sand sculptures on display in the tent draw their inspiration from Thai history and characters depicted in Thai literature.

The International Sand Sculpture Zone
These masterpieces by sculptors representing 13 participating countries capture the magnificence of a selection of famous landmarks from around the world including the Great Wall of China, the Eiffel Tower and the Statue of Liberty.

The World Sand Sculpture Festival in Samui will last for 4 months from November 28, 2007 – March 28, 2008.

Opening Hours:
Monday to Friday: 10.00 – 19.00
Saturday and Sunday: 09.00 – 20.00
Public holidays: 08.00 – 22.00

Admission Fee
80 baht for adults; 40 baht for children

Don’t miss this chance to see some incredible sand sculptures. I know if I was in or near Samui I would be going for sure. It’s the only way for me to enjoy sand sculpture since I can’t even make a simple sand castle on the beach, but even adults can dream.

Popularity: 7% [?]

Continue Reading

Christmas day I received a very nice present. One of the readers of Thailand Musings sent me an email letting me know how valued the blog is and how nice it is that someone is writing about Thailand and it’s food, culture etc. He also took the time to let me know a bit about himself and why he was interested in Thailand Musings.

Emails like that are a great inspiration, especially if you’ve been wondering if anyone actually reads what you’ve been writing or even cares. It renewed my passion for the blog and my readers and for that I would like to publicly thank this person for writing to me.

He also brought to my attention that I never completed the page “About Steve and Golf” and I want to apologize to all my readers for that oversight. I added the page when the blog created meaning to come back to it, but it left my mind as I began adding content to the blog.

Golf and I plan on writing our story over the next few days and you will be able to see an updated “About Golf and Steve” page by the new year.

Thank you again to the reader who sent me the email and thank you to all of you who read and subscribe to Thailand Musings. You’re the reason the blog exists.

Popularity: 2% [?]

Continue Reading

It is often said that the level of customer service at Thailand’s hotels is sub-par compared to the rest of the world.  Well, judging by the email I got yesterday it seems that some hotels are out to change that perception.

I received the above email from Remark Cottage even though the last time Golf and I stayed there was April 2006, over 1 1/2 years ago.  I can assure you that I did not receive any Christmas cards or emails from any of the other hotels I have stayed at over the past 2 years, Thai, European or American.  Here’s a small bit I wrote in October about Remark Cottage – I should really do a whole post reviewing the resort.

What a wonderful personal touch from a small boutique resort.  It’s now virtually guaranteed that not only will Remark Cottage stay in my mind, but will be my first choice for a hotel next time I go to Koh Chang.

Kudo’s to Remark Cottage!

Popularity: 11% [?]

Continue Reading