Thai Dowry or Bride Price

Thai culture expects men to pay a dowry (sin sot in Thai) or bride price prior to the marriage as a symbol of love, respect, appreciation and gratitude to the wife’s parents for raising and caring for her. It is a long standing tradition and is widely accepted in Thailand.

It seems that it developed from the fact that Thailand has no social benefits and children take care of their parents. Traditionally, sons will pay for the upkeep of the parents and the girls will do work for them (house and farm). So, when a daughter leaves her parents they are “compensated” with the dowry since the daughter will now “work” for her husband.

It is also a sign of readiness to support the future wife. In the West we are taught that love is separate from money, but in other cultures money may represent a symbol of love. I know that this is very different from the way that we think of money and love in the West. Part of this connection is due to the way that Thai people value generosity. Generosity is highly valued and it is often hard for Thai people to understand if someone does not want to show generosity.

Of course today many Thai parents are more modern thinking and the dowry is often more important as a visible sign to the community of how successful the new son-in-law is. The concept of “face” comes into play here. I can’t say that I understand this concept completely and will have to say that it is fundamentally about the perception other people have about us and ones importance relative to others.

It is acceptable to “negotiate” the dowry as well. Usually this will be done by a close friend or family member of the groom, however in the case of a foreigner marrying a Thai girl it would be done by the future bride. The amount of the dowry can vary widely and is usually dependent on how successful (and rich) the groom is (or perceived to be). Keep in mind too that many times the parents will return the dowry to the couple immediately after the wedding as a gift.

In my case, my in-laws gave back the gold in the dowry as a gift as well as much of the cash. They kept the money that was received from our guests as gifts to pay for the wedding ceremony. I thought this was extremely fair and generous, especially since it wasn’t expected. Of course each situation is different and while it is definitely more common these days for the return of the dowry as a gift it still isn’t an automatic.

I think the bottom line is if you love your Thai girlfriend then I wouldn’t worry too much about the dowry. If it is something you can afford then it is really no big deal. I mean really, how can you compare money to love? Money you can make more of it anytime, right? But for love…it is so elusive and difficult to find and keep. Ask yourself…can I live without this woman…then ask the same question about the dowry. I think that will put things into perspective.

Popularity: 11% [?]

Boiled Rice Recipe | Kao Tom

Boiled Rice - Kao Tom
Steve asked me 2 days ago to write the post for boiled rice because he wanted eveyone to try this delicious Thai menu that he likes. So finally I’ve just had some free time today to write the recipe.

Here we go the recipe for boil rice (2 servings)…

2 cups cooked jasmine rice
100-150 grams minced pork or chicken
1 cup of pork broth or chicken broth (depending on what kind of meat that you’re going to use)
1 TBS light soy sauce
1 TBS Golden Mountain Thai Seasoning Sauce
1/2 TBS salt
1/2 tsp ground black pepper
1/2 cup shallot,thinly sliced (you may use more because it will make your boil rice more tasty)
1/4 cup coriander,chopped
3 cups of water
3 TBS of cooking oil

You will be able to tell that not much for the recipe for this menu at all. Easy for your rushed morning even if you want to spend your nice time with nice meal. Or can cook in the evening and re-heat again in the morning it’s not going to take the good taste away at all.

Ok, first put the chicken broth and water in the pot over medium heat. Add soy sauce, Thai seasoning sauce, salt in the broth. During this time you can put 1 TBS oil in the wok and start to cook minced pork until it cooks. After the broth starts to boil remove the cooked pork from the wok and add it into the broth and wait until it starts to boil again and then decrease to low heat. Saute the shallot in 2 TBS of oil until fragrant and turn golden brown, remove and drain on absorbent paper.

And now it’s time to serve, put 1 cup of cooked rice into a serving bowl, add the broth with pork into the rice (just enough for abundance rice). Arrange on a serving bowl and sprinkle fried shallot, chopped coriander and pepper. Best when served hot and eat with another dish or by itself.

Next Wednesday I will present the recipe for everyone in your family “Peek Gai Todd” (fried chicken wings) and I guarantee everyone will love it. See you!

Popularity: 24% [?]

Thailand Prostitutes Get Protection

It’s well known that Bangkok is one of the top destinations for sex tourists. Along with nearby Pattaya sex travelers from around the globe come to Bangkok for sex, to live their fantasies and to have a good time in general.

Recently I found an article in The Nation that is reporting a panel has been established by the Thailand Labour Ministry to develop protection schemes for the independent workers in Thailands go-go bars and other nighttime service venues. The panel was created per the request from Empower Foundation which works for the rights of women in the sex industry.

Since Thailand has a very long standing history and tradition of prostitution providing protection and services for the Thai girls involved makes perfect sense. I don’t think trying to change the cultural mindset would be very successful, so prostitution in Thailand is not very likely to disappear anytime soon.

Currently social security plans and laws about standard wages don’t cover sex workers, but it could make the business much better for the thousands of poor Thai girls who enter it because they feel they have little other viable alternatives. Additionally, new laws could provide a registration system and allow for better healthcare and standard AIDS testing and certification for the myriad of sex workers in Bangkok and Thailand in general. This would improve conditions not only for the girls, but for their customers as well.

I’m not one to make moral judgements. Prostitution is the oldest known profession for a very good reason and as long as we can keep it safe for all parties I see no reason not to let consenting adults do whatever they like. I do believe that the government has some responsibility in keeping these girls safe and healthy so a plan like this would be beneficial.

I’m not holding my breath however since the comment made by the Thai Labour Ministry was that they are investigating the issue and that authorities have already encouraged the service venues (ie the go-go bars) to provide basic welfare for the girls. And I think that is as far as this will go.

The Thai government provides very little in the way of welfare programs now for it’s citizens and I don’t think that they are going to start with the sex workers. It doesn’t make sense for them politically.

In addition, Thai’s are very good at ignoring those things they don’t want to see and to hiding things that put them in a bad light lest they lose face. Prostitution in Thailand falls into this category I think and as soon as possible will be put back in the darkness where Thai’s don’t discuss it even though it is all around them.

Finally, this is a very long standing and complex situation. There are so many people involved and even if unacknowledged I think the sex industry in Thailand is accepted. Too change things at this point would affect some very rich and powerful people in Bangkok and that is why nothing will change. I can’t be sure, but I would be willing to bet that these people are the friends of the very politicians who would be making the new laws. They will privately lobby against this and nothing will change.

Just my two cents.

Popularity: 6% [?]

Gullivers Travelers Tavern | Khao San Road

At the end of Khao San road, opposite the police station the first thing you’ll see to your right is one of the hottest nightclubs on Khao San, perhaps in Bangkok, Gullivers Travelers Tavern. Both Golf and I know that a trip to Bangkok is not complete without a visit to Khao San and a trip to Khao San is not complete without a trip to Gullivers. Gullivers is quite literally a Bangkok legend and anyone you meet whose been through Thailand backpacking will have a story or two about Gullivers.

Gullivers actually has two locations in Bangkok, one at 6 Sukhimvit Soi 5 and the original and legendary one at 2 Khao San Road. With two floors, pool and foosball tables, VDO games and free internet stations there lots to do, but the real fun is in the people.

The crowd at Gullivers is an eclectic mix of expats, backpackers and Thai’s all out for a good time. You’ll find that the Thai girls at Gullivers are generally there because they like farang (foreigners) so don’t be shy, go ahead and buy a drink for someone and get your game on.

Of course, be careful because the drinks are strong. Last time we were there I started out with Long Island Iced Tea. Golf had never had them or even heard of them, but decided she wanted to try one. Just two drinks later I was nearly carrying her out to the sidewalk. Ever try to catch a cab while your gf or wife hangs (literally) on your arm throwing up in the gutter? Needless to say Golf avoids Long Island Iced Tea now .

Dress is casual so come as you are and you’ll fit right in. Drinks are expensive by Khao San Road standards, expect to pay 150 baht for a large Singha and up to 180 baht for imports. Seeing how strong they are the mixed drinks are your best value for the money at 250 baht. But hey, go ahead and splurge, you can go cheap at other places.

Gullivers is a great place to hang out, just watch people or hook up. If hooking up is your intention be careful though because not all the girls are girls, you will find ladyboys in the crowd. That being the case it may be good to have a designated sober person as well to keep the drunks in line. Trust me, more than one guy has woken up in the morning after a drunk in Bangkok to one heck of a surprise. Don’t be that guy.

This is all specific to Gullivers Khao San. I understand that the Gullivers on Sukhumvit is even larger, but I’ve never been there. Maybe next trip.

Popularity: 31% [?]

Kao Tom | Boiled Rice | Rice Soup

As much as I love Thai food there was one dish that, when I first heard about it, had no draw for me at all. It’s kao tom – literally “rice soup” and also known as boiled rice by some. Yeah I know you’re thinking the same thing, boiled rice sounds sooooo appetizing.

So, it was with some trepidation and the image of a gruel like bland substance in my mind that I first went out with Golf in search of boiled rice.

And you know what? kao tom is NOT anything like what I would have imagined. Yes it is a soup, generally from chicken or pork stock, and it is full of rice, but it is so much more too.

Boiled rice is a combination of soup stock, rice, ground chicken or pork, coriander and (my favorite part) fried shallots. It is warm and filling and savory and even though the the Thai’s eat it for breakfast, but I’ve found it’s good anytime - morning, noon or night.

Golf has promised to share her boiled rice recipe here soon and I highly recommend you give it a try, it is fantastic!

Popularity: 44% [?]

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